Polonium's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[sherry enema: #2]

I consider this

By far one of the most under-viewed flash on Newgrounds. I usually make sure to balance out the grading of a movie with the actual artisic content as well as the writing, but in a moment of self-admitted hypocrisy, I can't help but focus on the actual writing itself. It's a clever parody on gun control arguments with some nice not-so-subtle jokes, but what really strikes me is how PERFECTLY the voice acting translates from the script, and then how perfectly the voice acting then traslates to the art.

For this wonderous harmony of three mediums, I will award bonus grades to the art, because I can't imagine Tony, or his argument, being any other way than it is.

[Gordon]

heheheh

If Gordon Brown was so dull he'd leave the country alone at least, instead of screwing it up.

This was pretty damn catchy, the quality of the animation was actually quite a lot lower than your usual fare though, I thought.

[Chuck's New Tux!]

CNT has become

So iconic, that nothing I can say has possibly been unsaid before. I feel I should pay homage to it's wonder though, so here it is: my unwritten homage.

[Doctor's Visit]

oh, explosm

I've seen all these from the explosm homepage for plenty of time now, and several of them from the first day released, and I never once considered that these weren't on Newgrounds. Rob used to be an NG biggie, so I assumed they were mostly posted and lost in the bowels of the site.

These could do with some personal credits in the Author Comments though - was this animated by Chase using Kris' sprites, or Kris himself? Since I've seen all these before I skip the credits, so I don't remember until I look it up on explosm or replay it. this goes out basically uncredited for people who don't sit through the few seconds of ILYH.

[Tobacco Man]

this movie goes

Straight back to 'the problems of the future, today' age, spiritually. Newgrounds may be filled with as many artsy-fartsy flash as it can tolerate in the future (okay, artsy flash are fine 99% of the time and constitute a vital part o the portal), but as long as flash like these still exist still exist, NG still exists. It's so twisted...so hilarious. Some of the jokes are a little drawn-out like the little girl scene, but the truck exhaust scene easily ranks as one of the most gross and stomach-churning scenes in any ameteur flash.

Also, it very interesting to see a near unique combination of script writers and visual/audio artists. Maybe these collaborations will spark off in the future and make a name for some literary minds while feeding otherwise uninspired animators with plenty of source material to bring to life.

My lungs hurt, out.

[Pico Epsilon]

well

In general, I liked this, but a few things ticked me off:

-People continuing other people's shit is never meant to happen. If they leave it like that, then that's how it was meant to be left.

-How long until the Pico-Is-Traumatised thing finally stops being overused?

-Darnell looks like he has terrible muscle conditions. I guess he has 5 years to live for a reason.

-Try shooting down a giant missile with 3 bullets. Try.

-Since when did shooting at the floor cushion an impact? Jump off a 20 storey building and try that shit.

-Most of the actual gore is pretty lacking, I've seen 12 year olds draw better head explosions and I'm not kidding. That's criminal in a Pico flash.

-And lastly, my biggest complaint - I hate it when people take Pico source material too seriously. It's fine deviating on a formula and making it more unique, but Pico is about a kid who fights a bunch of goth kids with superpowers, friend to a stereotyped pyro and a suicidal slut. It doesn't need to be rewritten into war and peace.

BiffTheTimid responds:

Everything in the movie is physically possible, because its the law. If its not possible in real life, you aren't allowed to make a movie about it.

I don't know what you consider "too serious", but that's why there's a Pico Day, so you can make movies about Pico. They don't have to all be light hearted and "silly". For all the stuff you hated about the movie, you gave it a 7, so thanks.

[Strawberry Clock VI]

this is

The most emotionally moving and wonderful movie on newgrounds by far, I don't think I'll ever see anything better from the site.

[Happy Birthday K-Guare!]

this guy

Must be worth hell of a lot to you. About 12fps worth, in fact.

Magical-Zorse responds:

actually, it was 8 fps